Relaxation

“It’s one of the great paradoxes of the human condition—we ask some variation of the question ‘How are you feeling?’ over and over, which would lead one to assume that we attach some importance to it.  And yet we never expect or desire—or provide—an honest answer.” ~Mark Brackett, Ph.D., Permission to Feel I used to feel

“Love is loving things that sometimes you don’t like.” ~Ajahn Brahm You’ve probably heard the saying “You can’t find love until you learn to love yourself.” What this really means is that when you love yourself, you’re also fully able to accept another’s love for you because you know that you deserve it. Unfortunately, some

Over the last thirteen years of running this site, I’ve read comments and emails from thousands of people with varied wants and struggles, but it seems to me it all boils down to the following two things: We all want to feel good and avoid feeling bad, and we all need to connect with other

“Our sense of belonging can never be greater than our level of self-acceptance.” ~Brené Brown Sitting there watching The Greatest Showman, with tears pouring down my face, I asked myself why does this song, in fact this whole film, make me cry so much? Why does it evoke so much emotion in me? “I am

“Overthinking ruins you. It ruins the situation. And it twists things around. It makes you worry. Plus, it just makes everything worse than it actually is.” ~Karen Salmansohn I grew up with parents who believed a kid shouldn’t have friends and should be indoors always. Because of that, I never had real friends in my

Dear pain-in-my-feet: I’m sorry we ever met. Remind me where I made your acquaintance? Oh, yes—on my February trip to Death Valley, where I assumed long days of hiking had caused a rock bruise. Instead of healing, you got worse and jumped to the other foot, too. Thanks for the reminder. It helps. Because I

“The master leads by weakening their ambition and toughening their resolve.” ~Tao Te Ching How much of productivity advice is ableist? Sure, there are lots of good ideas and concepts in there, but most of it is healthy body focused. Advice like: “Be sure to exercise in the morning.” “Get up early before anyone else.”

“If I had the chance I’d ask the world to dance, but I’d be dancing with myself.” ~Billy idol Spending long periods of time alone—as I’ve done while traveling solo over the past year—is an eye-opening experience. Without the distractions of my normal routine and relationships, I’ve been able to take a good look around

“Sometimes what you’re most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.” ~Robert Tew Everyone has fears. It is not an emotion that is only for a chosen few. One’s fear may seem irrational to the outside world, but I guarantee to that person it is debilitating. So much so, that

“Don’t believe everything you think.” ~Unknown I am a self-confessed overthinker. I could spend hours thinking and going down the rabbit hole in my mind trying to find answers to all sorts of situations. About ten years ago, I struggled with burnout. I was a nurse for about twenty-two years. All I knew was nursing,

“Happiness is like being cool, the harder you try, the less it is going to happen. So stop trying. Start living” ~ Mark Manson I am a lucky person. In this crazy pandemic, my entire family and I have made it through in one piece. My husband has been out of work for half of

“Patriarchy is the expression of the immature masculine. It is the expression of Boy psychology, and, in part, the shadow—or crazy—side of masculinity. It expresses the stunted masculine, fixated at immature levels.” ~ Robert Moore & Doug Gillette Seventy eggs, packs of bacon, and multiple types of beer filled the fridge. On the counter lay

“Sit with it. Sit with it. Sit with it. Sit with it. Even though you want to run. Even when it’s heavy and difficult. Even though you’re not quite sure of the way through. Healing happens by feeling.” ~Dr. Rebecca Ray When my husband died from terminal brain cancer in 2014, I learned all about

“The shortest way to do many things is to do only one thing at once.” ~Samuel Smiles I am a recovering multitasker. I’m sure you know what multitasking is—it is the performance of more than one task at a time. For me it can look like this: “Watching TV” might include scanning social media on

“Your anger? It’s telling you where you feel powerless. Your anxiety? It’s telling you that something in your life is off balance. Your fear? It’s telling you what you care about. Your apathy? It’s telling you where you’re overextended and burnt out. Your feelings aren’t random, they are messengers. And if you want to get

“You are not too old and it is not too late.” ~Unknown In less than a month, I’ll be hitting a major “milestone” birthday. I quit my full-time job six months ago, ending a twenty-plus year career in education, and have spent time thinking about what I want the next chapter of my life to

“Beauty doesn’t come from physical perfection. It comes from the light in our eyes, the spark in our hearts, and the radiance we exude when we’re comfortable enough in our skin to focus less on how we look and more on how we love.” ~Lori Deschene For as long as I can remember, my mom

“The way we treat our children directly impacts what they believe about themselves.” ~Ariadne Brill Growing up, I always felt odd. I often wondered what was wrong with me. I compared myself to my friends and always thought they had a better life than me. They had both parents still together, went on family vacations.

“I really believe in the philosophy that you create your own universe. I’m just trying to create a good one for myself.” ~Jim Carrey If someone had told me years ago I’d one day be serving mushroom mafalda to a former VIP client, I’d have laughed in their face. Not an “I wouldn’t be caught

**This post contains a giveaway—details at the bottom of the post. If you’re reading this in your inbox, click here to participate on the site! “Self-care equals success. You’re going to be more successful if you take care of yourself and you’re healthy.” ~Beth Behrs Does your job ever seem to take over your life?

“If we can share our story with someone who responds with empathy and understanding, shame can’t survive.” ~Brené Brown The embarrassment you feel upon realizing you don’t actually have what it takes to make a success of yourself. The shame of knowing you spent years training to do one thing and then you bailed right

“At any moment, you have a choice, that either leads you closer to your spirit or further away from it.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh When I was a kid, I wanted to be an Olympic figure skater. Or an artist for Disney. Or maybe a musician. I wanted to be a songwriter and choreographer. I made

“Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside of us while we live.” ~Norman Cousins On September 23, 2015, Loukas Angelo was walking to his after-school strength and conditioning class just a few hundred yards from Archbishop Mitty High School. He was approaching the outdoor basketball courts when

“Ironically enough, when you make peace with the fact that the purpose of life is not happiness, but rather experience and growth, happiness comes as a natural byproduct. When you are not seeking it as the objective, it will find its way to you.” ~Unknown I have always enjoyed helping others. Ever since I can

“Boundaries define us. They define what is me and what is not me. A boundary shows me where i end and someone else begins, leading me to a sense of ownership. Knowing what I am to own and take responsibility for gives me freedom.” ~Henry Cloud Late last night, I once again found myself unable

“In some ways suffering ceases to be suffering at the moment it finds a meaning.” ~Viktor Frankl When life goes sideways, it can be hard to take one more breath, let alone find meaning. Trust me. I know. In the same year, I had breast cancer, chemo, radiation, and a divorce I didn’t want. There’s

“There is no place so awake and alive as the edge of becoming.” ~Sue Monk Kidd From a small café overlooking the boat harbor in Seward, Alaska, I looked out the window at the enormous mountain peak of Mount Alice that protruded from the earth behind rows of tour boats, sailboats, and a cruise ship

“Don’t equate your self-worth with how well you do in life.  You aren’t what you do. If you are what you do, then when you don’t…you aren’t.” ~Wayne Dyer As you crawl into bed, thump your pillow to make the perfect little cave for your head to rest in, pull the covers up tight under

“The truth is that there is no such thing as a negative emotion. Emotions only become ‘bad’ and have a negative effect on us when they are suppressed, denied, or unexpressed.” ~Colin Tipping Emotions are constantly and powerfully guiding our lives, even when we are not aware of them, even when we do not feel

“You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start from where you are and change the end.” ~C.S. Lewis  It was a dark January day in 2008 when my auntie called with the news “He did it.” I felt so confused. “Did he try? Or did he succeed?” I asked as my